"Speaking of girdles, I am having a little trouble with my left hip and thinking that wearing those girdle panties again might help support it, but don't have access to a source." The e mail from Mom in Mexico contained this broad hint. Why were we speaking of girdles? Well, it's part of a "dialogue" about gender identity. I mentioned girdles, because on one memorable birthday, Mom sent me a cosmetic bag and a girdle as gifts. You would think that having known me for 40 some years she would have given up trying to mold me into her notion of a feminine figure, but no. You would think that sending me on a shopping expedition might be something she'd know better than to try after all these years, too. My husband did all my shopping for 20 years, for crying out loud.
Why I can't stop smoking: I am in deep denial about my womanhood.
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This blog used to be called "Why I Can't Stop Smoking." Well, I did stop smoking. Now I need to stop drinking. The only thing is, every day there seems to be a reason why I can't just yet. It worked before, so—here goes! Today's reason
mr. and mrs. jones
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About Me
- Claudia
- The sister of the President of the Garden Club, a former journalist (People, Life) and now vacation rental property manager on an island once known as Claudia's Island, Claudia has honed her bedmaking skills and seldom travels without a truckload of substandard chairs.
4 comments:
No, you are just in denial about girdles.
You remember Jerry told you about the two-episode pilot he has planned for next seasons CSI? The serial killer's m.o. is he strangles his victims. He uses girdles. Wears them, then uses them on the vics. After he kills them, he buries them in the sand, and smokes a cigarette.
Jerry wants Brad to play the killer. Brad told Jerry he'd think about doing it, but only if his character has some redeeming qualities. Like he's nice to little old ladies, and looks good in Armani.
I think the killer should be an women who's mother refuses to listen to her and sends her girdles on her birthday. Brad can be the detective that chain smokes. They get together over smoking...as they are the only people outside the non smoking bar. He is looking to redeem himself and wears armani suits. She is looking to stop her mother from sending girdles to her and stop the cycle of killings that happens after receiving girdles.
True love happens in the last half hour of the film.
In real life..he leaves Anjolie for other women.
Dear Oceangurl: I understand that you are not necessarily content in Pittsburg.
I am prepared to offer you a position as a scriptwriter for CSI New York, beginning in 2006. If, that is, you would consider relocating to Hollywood, Californiafor several months. I like to work closely with my new writers.
Sincerely, Jerry
Jerry,
Have your people contact my people...I am interested in your offer to move.
Oceangurl
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